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  • Ali

Cornfields


We're back in Colorado! Address for mail is C/O Connie Shaw 3505 23rd street, Boulder, 80304. It feels good to be back in our home state, even if we aren't in Leadville, our home town. Thanks to our friend, Connie, we have a place to call home as we prepare for my Oncologist apt. this Wednesday. It feels good to have found someone highly recommended, even as the idea of what's ahead makes me nauseous. I find I do best with what is directly in front of me. 2 days ago, while on the road, I was aware (as I have been for some time) of the play of light and dark on my state of mind and my experience of all of this. Broad daylight brings a different sense of what is possible than dusk or evening. Both are part of some whole truth. Daylight is action time, and in it I feel much is possible, I feel strong and active and "me" in whatever particular way I am being "me" at the moment. Night seems to be the more subtle truth of being held in Something unknown, vast, and if I can let go into it, I find it to be deeply wise and loving. This is what I call God, though the name is not what matters now. Two days ago, as George and I were driving west, into the sunset, when we came upon a beautiful cornfield. We got out of the van and walked along the corn stalks, a beautiful white fence on our left. Pausing for that moment was incredible. It is a moment that has lingered, full of love and beauty and peace.


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